Victim of Love

The thoughts and prayers of a soul who deeply desires to Love God as He Himself desires to be Loved.

Saturday, April 30, 2005

What will heaven be like?

The smile of a child?
The melodious song of birds in the evening?
The beauty of a freshly plucked rose?
The sweet smell of the most fragrant of flowers?
The coolness of dew on the grass on a summer's morn?
The innocence of a newborn baby?
The blazing beauty of an awe-inspiring sunset?
The glorious sight of a multi-colored bow encircling the sky?
A golden sea of buttercups on a bright sunny day?
A beautiful maiden who has not lost her innocence?
A stately young man so handsome and grand?
A choir of children singing joyful songs?
The love between lovers enraptured at the sight of one another?
A mother's arms?
A father's protection?
The rays of the sun peeking out from behind the clouds?
A first kiss?
The embrace of a long lost loved one?
Sitting by the fire with a loving family?
Relaxing conversation between friends?
Finding out the one you love is deeply in love with you?
The forgiveness of a loved one whom you have hurt?
The peace one feels while praying in a secluded spot?
The majestic sight of a mountain or canyon?
The taste and comfort of a home cooked meal?
The joy of a festival?
The anticipation and excitement of a child on Christmas Eve?
The refreshment of a long vacation?
The satisfaction of a job well done?
The joy of making someone smile?
Loving and being Loved for all eternity?
What will heaven be like?
"Eye has not seen, ear has not heard, nor has it even entered into the heart of man, what God has prepared for those that Love Him."

Friday, April 22, 2005

Mary, Our Loving Mother

I mentioned earlier that the moon is a symbol of Our Lady. This is something that I love to meditate on. It delights me to stare up at the night sky and see the full moon in all its glory and the shining stars gathered around it... Some brighter than others... In the moon I see the glory of Our Lady and in the stars the lesser glory of the saints.

Of course Our Lady's glory is only a reflection of the glory of her Son, just as the moon doesn't shine with it's own brilliance but reflects the light of the sun. And since she is the Immaculate Conception she reflects the glory of God in a much brighter, more perfect way than all the saints who ever were or ever will be.

I was also interested to see a map of the moon. Scientists have named the dark areas "seas" even though there is no water on the moon. In Latin they are called "mare" pronounced "Mah-ray". Sounds alot like Mary to me... What's even better is that some of the seas seem to describe our heavenly Mother. There's Mare Fecunditatis, Mare Nectaris (she's most sweet), Mare Nubiuim (she's symbolized in the little cloud the size of a man's hand in the story of Elijah; a cloud that brings forth rain after a long drought, rain symbolising the grace we received through the Son she brought forth), Mare Serenitatis, Mare Tranquillitatis, Mare Orientale (Our Lady of the East), and Mare Cognitum (Our Lord has made known to us her glory). They don't all seem to point to her, but it's nice to know that some of these "maria" could be her titles.

Oh, how I love Our Lady! If more people knew her, then more people would know her Son and they would Love Him more. Dear Lord, make your mother known and Loved, for Your names sake. Amen.

Tuesday, April 19, 2005

Habemus Papem!!!

We have a Pope!!

Joseph Cardinal Ratzinger has been elected as the 265th pontiff. He took the name of Benedict XVI. What a "blessing" he is! It was a cloudy day in Rome but the moment of the announcement the sun began to shine! The Gospel for the day read, "How long will you keep us in suspense?" The Jews were asking Our Lord if He was the Christ, but we all were asking Our Heavenly Father today, "How long..." and the answer finally came at 6:04 pm Roman time. So let us sing the entrance antiphon in our hearts: Let us shout out our joy and happiness, and give glory to God, the Lord of all, because he is our King, alleluia!

His first words to us: "Dear brothers and sisters, after the great Pope John Paul II, the cardinals have elected me - a simple, humble worker in the vineyard of the Lord. The fact that the Lord can work and act even with insufficient means consoles me, and above all I entrust myself to your prayers. With the joy of the risen Lord and confidence in His constant help, we will go forward. The Lord will help us and Mary his Most Holy Mother will be alongside us. Thank you."


Thursday, April 14, 2005

A Marian Treasury

Today at Mass I was struck with how the Host resembles the moon. As I thought about it I'm sure it's no coincidence that the moon has always been thought of as a symbol of Our Lady. Pope John Paul II has called Mary "a woman of the Eucharist". It is because of Our Lady's "Fiat" that we have the Eucharist and it is truly Flesh of her flesh and Blood of her blood. If you want to read our beloved Pope's thoughts on Our Lady Sr. Marianne Trouve, FSP has compiled them in a beautiful book called A Marian Treasury.

Little Rewards

Yesterday I decided to fast until 3:00 in reparation for the great sacrilege that has been committed on Ebay regarding the Eucharist. I took only a little bread and water at noon, and since I'm a nursing mother, I was feeling very weak by the time 3:00 rolled around. At about 3:10 I spotted my neighbor walking up the street to my house with a plate full of German Chocolate Cupcakes! She handed them to me and told me the Holy Spirit had inspired her to make them and bring them to me! (She had no idea I was fasting.) Again I say, how sweet Our Lord is!

Saturday, April 09, 2005

Today after Mass I went for a walk at our town's very small nature park. As I was walking up the gravel path a little rock fell into my shoe. I decided to leave it there in honor of the wound in the right foot of Our Lord. So there I am walking along, enjoying the sweet smell of the pure, breezy air and I walk right past a woman who had just decided to light up a cigarette. Such a small thing, but it irritated me. So I said, "For You dear Lord." And then I remembered the times when I used to smoke. Times that I really didn't want to remember. I felt truly sorry for those times and I said, "Lord, I'm so sorry for smoking cigarettes, and even more sorry for all the horrible things I did during those times." And I heard an answer in the depths of my heart, "What things? I don't remember anything." How sweet!

Friday, April 08, 2005

Enthronement of the Sacred Heart

Today our parish priest came to our home to enthrone the Sacred Heart of Jesus. I was blessed to have Mass said in my kitchen on the very table that we eat at today. May Jesus reign in our family and be King of our lives. I was so joyful today as I cleaned house to prepare for tonight. The sun was shining, our wisteria bush was in full bloom, the yard was bedecked with buttercups, and I had a special prayer in my heart. It was a prayer similar to one I prayed years ago, a few days after Mother Teresa died. I reflected on the fact that since Pope John Paul II had died there was a lot less Love on this earth than before. With great confidence in God's mercy and knowing full well that when we ask we receive, I begged God to fill my heart with the same amount of Divine Love that the earth had just lost. I also asked the priest to say this prayer for me during the consecration. I feel sure that my prayer was answered. Two things that happened today assure me that it was: This morning my heart was pierced by something someone said to me. This was done to open my heart to receive this Love. After the enthronement I felt humiliated and my soul was filled with bitterness. This is a suffering that is caused by the Fire of God's Love alone. These sufferings seem to come from exterior happenings, but I know better. Also, the priest spoke only about Divine Love during the homily and used Mother Teresa and Our Holy Father as examples. I thank you, O Lord, for Your great mercy and kindness and that You look with Love on such a miserable thing as me.

Tuesday, April 05, 2005

Do Little Things With Great Love...

"If you feel too lazy to pick up a bit of thread, and you nonetheless do it for the love of Jesus, you have more merit than some great accomplishment made in a moment of fervor.” ~ St. Therese

I give ALL to You

O my Jesus, I Love You and want to make You Loved! Yet I am one of the worst sinners who ever lived. And if I look at all the graces You have given me then I can say that I am the most responsible for Your sufferings. Not that I'm an important soul or that You need me to "save the world", but that I am the most wretched nothing that has ever crucified You. Even after You showed me Your infinite Love, I murdered You. I disdained Your gifts and sought after human love. I deeply regret all that I have done to hurt You and Your Most Holy Mother. But I know that You "make all things new". Renew me and make me like a virgin once again, for I am old and weary. Make me pure, O Mother, with your immaculate purity. Transform me, Jesus, into Your very self. I want to suffer the deepest torments for Love of You and I don't want to be rewarded. I take the last place, dear Lord, not only here on earth but also in heaven. Let everyone who would have been under me move up a notch. Yes, I want my whole being to Love You, but if it would make You smile then I sacrifice that too. I accept not Loving You as much as I desire for all eternity if it would please You and make others burn with Love for You. What does it matter if it be me or someone else who Loves You as You deserve. I don't deserve to Love You at all. The only thing I deserve is hell. Yet I have great confidence in You and purgatory does not worry me. I keep nothing for myself - no merits, no indulgences, nothing at all. I give it to you my Lady for you to do with as you desire. I am all Yours and I will hold nothing back. I want to Love you also, sweet Mother, and make you known and Loved. How can I do this? I am nothing and obnoxious to all that I meet. I understand that even on a merely human level I have no talents at all. I once read about a saint being canonized and the title said, "Poor in Talents, Rich in Love". This delighted me. Thank you Lord for all the graces you have bestowed upon that soul. Thank you for all You have done for me.

Monday, April 04, 2005

Miracles do happen!

Holy Father, pray for us!

I urge you to pray to Pope John Paul II for any intentions you may have. I promise you'll not be sorry. Two hours after his most holy death, I knelt down and prayed for my very troubled husband and it has been miraculous! He has changed from frowning to smiling, from tearing our family down to being kind - this is a HUGE MIRACLE! My prayers for him for years have basically gone unanswered and it took Pope John Paul the Great a mere 3 hours! Now I pray that he will not lose the grace through his own fault that Our Holy Father has gained for him.

Friday, April 01, 2005

To my Holy Father: Pope John Paul II

My dear, dear Papa... How I wanted to meet you one day, to kneel at your feet and kiss your ring, but I never got the chance. How I wanted to ask you to pray for me and those I love because I knew that your prayers were very powerful with God. Now it looks like the end. Though I'm still praying and waiting for a miracle, how gloriously happy you will be when you stand before Our Lord and receive His eternal embrace.

I Love you, dear Papa. Remember me when you come into your kingdom.